From the movie ‘The Perks Of Being A Wallflower’:
Charlie: Why do nice people choose the wrong people to date?
Mr Anderson: … We accept the love we think we deserve
Charlie: Can we make them know that they deserve more?
Mr Anderson: We can try.
While Charlie wonders about Sam’s (a girl friend) bad choices, he forgets it applies to him too, in that he feels he doesn’t deserve Sam’s love.
In this coming of age movie, there is subtle confusion, which is similar to movies about grown-ups, from mixing up of love as platonic care and concern with love in the amourous sense. It is never wrong to care lustlessly, but unfortunately, sexual tension can easily creep in and mess things up with more hopes that might be dashed, leading to heartbreak that even jeopardises the original friendship.
Sometimes, friendship cannot grow because of this tension. Sometimes, it even becomes strained. This is why it is less easy for guys and girls to be really very good friends in the non-romantic sense? But hey, why not? Part of spiritual maturity is being able to see the difference between just love, mere lust and love mixed with lust. Just so you know, in case you don’t, love, whether with lust or not, is always built upon friendship.