{"id":5514,"date":"2010-03-22T15:26:20","date_gmt":"2010-03-22T07:26:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/?p=5514"},"modified":"2010-03-22T15:27:24","modified_gmt":"2010-03-22T07:27:24","slug":"op-should-those-who-owe-us-pay","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/2010\/03\/op-should-those-who-owe-us-pay\/","title":{"rendered":"O$P$?: Should Those Who Owe Us Pay?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong> <\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-5517\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/03\/146.jpg?resize=98%2C114\" alt=\"\" width=\"98\" height=\"114\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/03\/146.jpg?w=98&amp;ssl=1 98w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/03\/146.jpg?resize=83%2C96&amp;ssl=1 83w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 98px) 100vw, 98px\" \/><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Q:<\/strong> <span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">If a friend owes me  money but says she is not able to pay me back  because of financial  difficulties, which seems to be true, will she create negative karma, if I have decided not to pursue the matter?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>S:<\/strong> <span style=\"color: #993300;\">Here are some questions to think over:<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p>[A] Did you give any time limit \u2013 that she can\u2019t meet?<br \/>\n[B] Is she unable to return the money now or unable to return it for the   rest of her life?<br \/>\n[C] Have you tried asking her to pay back at a  comfortable rate via installments?<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"color: #993300;\">Remembering that karma is  created based on intentional action, here are some possible scenarios:<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p>(1) If her intention was to not return the money \u2013<br \/>\neven before getting the money from you, it\u2019s deceit \u2013 and there is negative karma created.<br \/>\n(2) If her intention was to return the money before getting the money  from you,<br \/>\nbut turns out to be really unable to, there is no deceit and no  negative karma created.<br \/>\n(3) If her intention is to not return the money after getting the money  from  you,<br \/>\nbut turns out to be really able to, there is deceit and   negative karma created.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>But the truth is, things are often not so black and white \u2013 as there is another possibility \u2013 that <span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">she MIGHT be able to return the money \u2013 if she REALLY wants to.<\/span> She herself might not be mindful of this  possibility or not. If she can return the money if she puts  in effort, but decides not to, there is still deceit to some extent, and  negative karma created. If not, there is none.<\/p>\n<p>As hinted by questions [A], [B] and [C] above, usually, if you don\u2019t set a solid deadline, while asking her to pay back gradually in parts, it is possible to return the money \u2013 unless she is really very poor, cannot work and cannot save. <span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">There is a big difference between being unable to  return the money and being unwilling to return the money.<\/span> Suggesting the  installment method can urge her to cultivate some basic financial management skills too.  If you don\u2019t want to push her to return, you can still suggest the above to her and  ask her to consider it. You can even send this discussion to her.<\/p>\n<p>The fact that she is able to successfully \u2018borrow\u2019 (or is it \u2018take\u2019?) money from you means she had positive karma to receive kindness. However, <span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">if she chooses not to reciprocate with gratitude by  taking it for granted and does not return the kindness when she can and should,  she does create some negative karma and will be karmically less likely to receive such kindness in future<\/span>.<\/p>\n<p>That said, when lending money, it\u2019s best to consider the worst case scenario of not getting the money back before lending \u2013 because the  truth is, many people lend money and can\u2019t get it back. Only when you really cannot get the money back through any reasonable means should you really resign to the idea that it\u2019s your negative karma to lose money this way. <span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">When we let others off the debt hook too easily, we are not helping them to treasure and top-up their positive karma too.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>However, if you lent money out of kindness, you should never regret your good intention in the first place. When we regret our actions done out of  kindness, we lose some of the positive karma created through the action.\u00a0Helping the friend to learn how to be debt-free is the real  help in the  long run. <span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">Helping to introduce her to the Dharma is even more   helpful \u2013 because the Dharma learnt and practised well can benefit one  and  others life after life, while money is just a resource that comes  and goes.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Related Article: <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>To Lend Money or Not?<br \/>\n<a href=\"..\/2010\/03\/to-lend-money-or-not\/\" target=\"_self\">https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/2010\/03\/to-lend-money-or-not <\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Q: If a friend owes me money but says she is not able to pay me back because of financial&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[155,139,447,142],"class_list":["post-5514","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mix","tag-gratitude","tag-karma","tag-kindness","tag-regret","wpcat-1-id"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5514","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5514"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5514\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5514"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5514"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moonpointer.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5514"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}