Question: How do I cultivate loving-kindness for someone I dislike?
Answer: It helps to remember that just as you suffer from disliking the person, the person might suffer from being disliked, not just by you, but by many others too. Since no one wants to dislike or be disliked, both you and the person are victims of hatred. Worse still, if the person does not know that he or she has created or is creating negative causes to be disliked, that person is creating negative karma, that will lead to more suffering. Based on this, you can nurture loving-kindness for that person, wishing that person to be well and happy. Active loving-kindness in action beyond meditation would include letting the person know his or her mistakes.
Question: I’ve been trying hard to let go of the disliking but my mind just keeps reminding me of what this person has done. Hiding from this person is not a solution as I’m still aware of what the person did.
Answer: What has happened is already gone. If you can do something to address it, why not just do it? If there is nothing you can do to address it, then it is time to let it go too. Please see this: http://moonpointer.com/
Question: When you truly trust a person you thought is a great spiritual teacher, how do you face this person if he doesn’t practise what he preached?
Answer: You can tell the person your concerns, in person or in writing. If there is no proper response, you can consider making your concerns public in the press or online – if the person is harming or cheating many others as a result.
Question: Not only do I need to heal my own mind, but also my heart. The harder I try letting go, the harder it is as I used to admire this person whom I felt is a great spiritual teacher.
Answer: You must remember that if you are right that the person has many faults, that teacher is no longer the great teacher you once thought he was. It’s time to let go then. But as above, you might want to consider addressing the issues systematically too.